David & Suzanne's Big Frickin' Canadian Motorcycle Adventure

*** WARNING:  This book contains SATIRE, SARCASM, and HUMOR.  Cheap shots abound.  Snarky comments regarding your (insert political or religious affiliation here) are on every page.  Absurdity reigns.  Those without a sense of humor are requested to move along.  Nothing to see here. ***  The trip began innocently enough.

All they wanted was a simple, week-long vacation to celebrate their new freedom. How hard could that be?

With their last child pushed out the door, it was now 'their' time. Time to travel, to explore, to visit uncharted territories. Time for them to sample strange new cultures with strange new customs and strange new languages.

But where to go? And once the destination was decided, how to get there?

Not content with doing things the 'easy way', they first bought a motorcycle. A futuristic behemoth of a touring bike with a design ripped straight from the pages of Buck Rogers that proved to be a topic of conversation at each and every stop - whether they wanted to talk or not.

Armed with poor planning, poor judgment, laughter, love, and an optimism usually reserved for the perilously insane, our daring duo cast caution to the wind and headed straight into the heart of the deepest, darkest continent known to man: Canada.

In the days to come they would have ample time to reconsider the wisdom of their choices as they encounter torrential rains, stomach-churning mountain roads, Canadians, Grizzlies, creepy motel owners, moose, hidden tombs, cloned Vikings, more Grizzlies, starvation, dehydration, beavers, gourmet food, Karelian Bear Dogs, more Grizzlies, ferries, frog swarms and witchcraft all before reaching their final destination at a Lodge in the mountains of Banff National Park.

Would they survive? More importantly, would their 30-year marriage survive? And why is it exactly that in Canada milk comes in bags, the metric system rules, and every word has an extra 'u'?

These answers and more await inside. So pick a comfy chair and climb on board. It's a heck of a ride.